Who I am
by SkittlezLvr79
Summary: One Shot. Written for the WWE Library's August fic Contest. He loves her but is resigned to being just friends.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own the people used in this work of fiction. They belong to themselves. The company and their respective onscreen persona's belong to Vince McMahon. The song _Iris_ is property of the _Goo Goo Dolls_ and is being used solely for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement is intended.

_**

* * *

**__**And I'd give up forever to touch you,  
Cause I know that you feel me somehow**_

Green eyes watched her intently, devouring the vision of the curvaceous beauty as she walked down the hallway, going to get them some snacks to enjoy while watching movies. Most people would judge her based on her physical appearance but the verdict they'd come up with would be false. The body to die for and face of an angel was hard to get past but once they did, they'd find out the same thing he had. She was perfect, inside and out, everything a woman should be. The complete package of brains, good looks, compassion, empathy and personality was unparalleled.

Maybe he was biased since he was completely in love with her. But unfortunately, he could never find the courage to make his feelings known. Every time he even entertained the idea of telling her, his throat closed up on him or his mouth went dry. He knew that it really wasn't a physical reaction but a mental one. A psychological reaction to the potential rejection his admission could bring him.

_**You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be,  
And I don't want to go home right now**_

He knew that she didn't feel the same way about him. There was no way that she ever could. They were polar opposites, having little in common other than their career. She was the beautiful princess who deserved nothing but the best and he was the multicolor haired screw up who would probably be dead by forty. It would never work and would be scrutinized mercilessly. People would wonder why someone as perfect as her would be with someone as flawed as him.

But they were great as friends. Totally comfortable and at ease with each other. She trusted him with her dreams, her hopes and her goal of becoming the best women's wrestler in the company. If he risked telling her how he felt, it would change the dynamic between them. There'd be awkwardness or tension straining their relationship if he let his feelings be known.

_**And all I can taste is this moment,  
And all I can breathe is your life**_

The time they spent together meant everything to him. While it was getting harder him to remain silent, the risk of losing her was too great to ignore. If he couldn't have her as his girlfriend then he wanted her as his friend. He couldn't picture his life without her in it and didn't even want to try. It would be a bleak, lonely existence and wouldn't be worth suffering through.

Without her, he'd succumb to the darkness within him and retreat into himself. Beside Amy, no one else on the roster could get him to open up and get involved in things like she could. Most people thought he was weird because he dyed his hair crazy colors and painted his fingernails and stayed their distance. But with her, he never felt anything but accepted and cared for, valued for his uniqueness. That was what first attracted him to her, other than her killer looks.

_**And sooner or later it's over,  
I just don't want to miss you tonight**_

He'd noticed her beauty the moment he saw her entering the arena for the first time, captivated by the bright blonde hair and tanned, womanly body. As if she felt him watching her, she turned and gave him a dazzling smile. They met later that night, Amy handling introductions. Shyly, she shook his hand and complimented him on the match he had. But he hadn't heard any of it because he got lost in the richness of her chocolate colored eyes.

That was all it took for their friendship to blossom. After that meeting, they always hung out backstage, talking and laughing to pass the time. Then it evolved further and they started going places together. Most people didn't understand their friendship but neither one of them cared. They had fun and could be themselves, which was the only thing that mattered.

_**And I don't want the world to see me,  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand**_

She reappeared in his sight, arms loaded down with snacks; a slightly devious smile on her face. Waggling her eyebrows playfully, she dumped some of the junk food into his arms and headed into his room.

"Do I even want to know how you left with five dollars but came back with about twenty dollars worth of snacks?" He inquired as he kicked the door shut behind him, eyes on the heap of goodies in his arms.

"Someone left all the vending machines open!" She put two bottles of soda down on the nightstand. "Bad for them, great for us since we're having a movie night."

"Such a walking contradiction." He mused, dropping the pilfered junk food onto the bed along with her heap. "Looks like an angel but beneath the lovely visage, you're a pure devil."

_**When everything's made to be broken,  
I just want you to know who I am**_

She giggled and made horns with her fingers on the top of her head, wiggling them playfully and making a hissing sound. "I've been discovered! Now sign your soul over to me."

Little did she know that she already possessed his soul. It was hers for the taking anytime she wanted it and he wouldn't stop her. He rolled his eyes and dropped down on the bed, being careful to avoid their mountain of snacks. "What do you want to watch first?"

"Hmmm, so many to choose from." She sorted through them, studying every case intently before holding up her pick. "Definitely this one."

The movie was the Wedding Singer. He sighed heavily, not enthralled with the idea of having to watch a badly wigged Adam Sandler fall in love with the engaged but adorable Drew Barrymore and struggle not to let his feelings known. Hit a little too close to home for him. But the look of excitement and pleading on his face convinced him to let her have his way. "Pop it in."

_**And you cant fight the tears that ain't coming,  
Or the moment of the truth in your lies**_

She joined him on the bed, as usual, after putting the movie in and passed him a bag of skittles. Settling back, she rested her head on his shoulder, snuggling close to him. The scent of her fruity shampoo wafted into his nose, along with the sweet muskiness of her perfume. It was an intoxicating mixture and he shifted as his body began to react to the warmth emanating from her. She moved with him, her arm resting on his stomach, unaware of the turmoil raging inside him.

He focused his attention on the movie, trying to lose himself in the comedic romance instead of the nearness of her body. It took a while but the plan finally worked and he found himself caught up in the unfolding tale on the screen. Throughout the start of Adam and Drew's friendship, he felt the irony tugging at him but ignored it, not wanting to think about anything but the movie.

_**When everything feels like the movies,  
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive**_

Forty-three minutes into the movie, she broke the silence they had maintained. "How come you're not in a relationship?"

He looked down at her, eyes locking onto her, shock painted on his face. "Huh?"

"You're an amazing man." She told him sincerely, "How come you don't have someone?"

"I-I-I don't know." He stammered nervously, not liking this conversation. Franticly, he decided to turn it around on her and see if that would force her to either change the topic or go back to watching the movie. "How come you're not?"

_**And I don't want the world to see me,  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand**_

"It's complicated." She sighed, tossing long blonde locks over her shoulder. "See, I'm in love with this great guy but I don't think he feels the same."

It was like a dagger pierced his heart at her admission. He couldn't handle the idea of her loving someone other than him. But he was just her friend. The sooner he accepted it and acted like one, the better. Sighing, he decided to push aside his wounded pride and play the role. "What makes you think that?"

"I've thrown him some direct hints, touch him every chance I get but he doesn't respond to them at all."

"Darlin', you've got to understand exactly how intimidating you are to men. It's not everyday we see the complete package let alone have the opportunity to have her in our lives." He slowly explained, wanting her to recognize how special and awe-inspiring she really was. "Hell the prospect scares most of us to death."

_**When everything's made to be broken,  
I just want you to know who I am**_

The confusion was evident on her face, "Why?"

"Because we don't think that we deserve it, that we'll inevitably screw up the best thing that could ever happen to us." He shook his head in disbelief. "And the idea of having it then losing it would kill most men."

"So, what do you think I should do?" Her inquiry was quiet, speculative. "Should I continue dropping hints or should I try another tact? Because I'm getting tired of not knowing where I stand with him."

He couldn't believe that that she was asking him for relationship advice. Especially when he was suffering through the exact same situation in a silence that was slowly killing him. But to keep her from finding the love of her life just because he was too scared to confess his feelings for her would be selfish. "There's two ways you can go."

_**And I don't want the world to see me,  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand**_

"Ok." She nodded, her hand trailing along his stomach. "What are they and which one is better?"

"They're both proven methods. You can either tell this guy flat out how you feel." It was killing him to encourage her to go after someone else. "Or you can do something to show him exactly how you feel."

She digested that, nodding to herself. "I like the idea of doing something to show him because sometimes people can't believe the words. But an action can never really be denied."

"That's true."

_**When everything's made to be broken,  
I just want you to know who I am**_

"So what kind of action would you suggest as the most effective way to express my feelings for him?"

He wished he never got into this. But being a good friend meant offering as much help as possible, even if it broke your heart. "You can't go wrong with a kiss. And spare me the garbage about a kiss just being a kiss because it's not true. A kiss can tell someone so much with having to say the words."

"Really?" She seemed surprised by the suggestion, almost worried about it. "Just kiss him? No warning? No…nothing?"

"Don't think about it." He let out a sigh, "The next time you see this guy just walk right up and kiss him. If he kisses back then you know he feels the same."

_**And I don't want the world to see me,  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand**_

"Is it really that simple?"

"Yeah," He shrugged and the gesture slightly shifted her away from him. "The hardest part is thinking about it or trying to plan the perfect moment. Doing it spontaneously is so much easier and makes more of an impact."

She sat up, turning to face him. For a long minute she just stared at him then a smile broke across her lips. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me." He pleaded softly. "It's what friends do."

Her hand went to his face, cupping his cheek and caressing it. Chocolate eyes found his and locked on, staring right into the emerald pools as if she was staring into his soul. She moved closer to him and leaned down, her lips hovering close enough to his that he could feel her breath fanning against them. Swallowing thickly, her lips closed over his in the softest, sweetest, tentative kiss he ever experienced.

_**When everything's made to be broken,  
I just want you to know who I am**_

His shock ebbed and his arms wrapped around her waist, drawing her closer to him. He returned the explorative kiss, taking leisurely tastes of her incredible lips. Her tongue traced his lower lips, seeking permission to take their exploration to a deeper level. Pliant lips parted, accepting the request, and her tongue stroked into his mouth. They took turns being in charge, becoming familiar with the other's kiss.

Her arms bound around his neck as her body settled on top of his. The warmth of her lithe figure drove him crazy and his hands roamed her back, sides and hips hungrily. He playfully nipped her bottom lip then laved the bite with his tongue, drawing a breathy gasp from her. Rolling them over, he pinned her beneath him, taking control of the situation. The kiss turned searing as he finally allowed all the pent up passion and desire to escape.

_**I just want you to know who I am  
I just want you to know who I am**_

The need for air forced them to part and their erratic breathing filled the room. He looked down at her, pushing errant locks of hair from her face and found his voice. "Me?"

"Of course." Trish nodded, tears welling in her eyes. "From the minute I met you, I knew that they'd never be anyone else for me. I just didn't know if you felt the same."

"Believe me darlin', I do." Jeff smiled and closed the distance between them, capturing her mouth in another intense kiss.

_**I just want you to know who I am**_


End file.
